Stress can wreak true havoc on your life, both personally and professionally. Symptoms of extreme stress can take both emotional and physical forms.
Some common physical symptoms include aches and pains, diarrhea or constipation, nausea and/or dizziness, chest pain, rapid heartbeat, loss of libido, and frequent colds. Emotional symptoms may include moodiness, irritability or short temper, agitation or inability to relax, feeling overwhelmed, a sense of loneliness and isolation, and depression or general unhappiness.
When feeling overwhelmed by stress, it’s important to try to identify specific stressors and to examine how you cope with them. You can then work to avoid, alter, adapt to, or accept the stressors in your life.
To avoid unnecessary stress, learn how to say no.
Know your limits and stick to them, in both your professional and personal lives. Whenever possible, steer clear of people who cause you stress. Take control of your environment – if scary movies make you anxious, for example, don’t watch them. Stay away from hot-button topics like religion or politics if they make you upset or cause conflict. And finally, pare down your to-do list. Separate the “shoulds” from the “musts” and drop anything that is not truly essential.
To alter stressful situations you can’t avoid, express your feelings rather than bottling them up.
If something is bothering you, convey your concerns openly but respectfully. At the same time, remain open to compromise. When you ask someone to change their behavior, be willing to do the same so that you can find a happy middle ground.
In addition, be assertive and deal with problems head on, doing your best to anticipate and prevent them. And finally, manage your time better. Don’t stretch yourself too thin and end up running behind.
If you can’t avoid or alter the stressor, you can adapt to it.
Learn to view stressful situations from a positive perspective. You can reframe a traffic jam, for example, as an opportunity for some reflection time. Also, look at the big picture of a stressful situation. Ask yourself how important the stressor will be in the long run and whether it’s really worth getting upset over. If not, refocus somewhere else.
Adjust your standards as well. Don’t set yourself up for failure by demanding perfection from yourself and others. Focus on the positive by thinking about all of the blessings in your life, including your positive qualities and gifts.
A fourth way to deal with stress is to accept the stress you cannot change.
Don’t try to control the uncontrollable – a category that encompasses many aspects of our lives, including other people’s behavior. Focus instead on things you can control, such as your reactions to problems.
Again, look for the upside when facing major challenges and try to see them as opportunities for growth. When the stress gets to be too much, confide in someone you trust. Expressing your feelings can be cathartic, even when you’re powerless to change a situation.
Last but not least, learn to forgive – yourself as well as others.
Accept the fact that we live in an imperfect world, and people make mistakes. Let go of anger and resentments and move on.
Remember that an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure, so take time to relax and have fun when you detect symptoms of stress in your life. Set aside to time to rest, spend time with positive people, and do something you enjoy every day. And most of all, keep your sense of humor – including your ability to laugh at yourself.
Ask for help. If you’re constantly running on empty, your mind, body, and soul will suffer the repercussions of your tenacity. There’s no shame in asking for a helping hand. Sometimes, you’ll be able lean on a spouse, coworker, or friend, but other times you may have to hire help.
If your mounting responsibilities are barely allowing you the necessary time to eat and sleep, you may have too much on your plate. Streamline your responsibilities by creating a time-effective plan for crossing the items off of your to-do list in less time.
Most people are delighted to be needed and will be more than willing to help you. If housework is the culprit of your stress, divide the tasks equally amongst the family members in your household.
Set aside time for yourself. What do you enjoy doing? Knitting, relaxing in a bubble bath, drawing, lounging in bed watching reruns of the Gilmore Girls? Indulge yourself in your favorite lazy activity a few times each week. One of my favorite ways to unwind is through movement – particularly Ecstatic Dance and Somatic Movement. You might want to try this course by Bernadette Pleasant: Somatic Dance for Emotional Alchemy.
Carve out a few hours each weekend to indulge in your favorite lazy activity. Choose at least one weeknight to relax after work. Sitting in a candlelit bubble bath while listening to your favorite CD and reading a magazine is an effective treatment for washing the day’s stresses away.
Refrain from feeling selfish for taking time for yourself. You may be a busy professional, a spouse, a parent and have a home to maintain all at the same time; however, taking two hours now to de-stress will save you from going into overdrive and possibly stressing out your loved ones later.
Socialize! Making time for socializing with friends and family is a vital aspect of managing your stress levels. Friends and family make you laugh and provides you with a shoulder to lean on. This, in itself, will deplete your stress levels exponentially.
If possible, designate one day per week (like Sundays) to spend time with extended family and friends. You could host a neighborhood barbeque in your backyard, host a Sport Sunday gathering, or simply have coffee with your closest pals.
Life in our modern world can get very busy and demanding. Juggling things such as jobs, parenting, and relationships can get the better of anyone who is not taking time to take care of themselves. It is admirable to multitask and to be as productive as possible. However, you do require some time to take care of yourself.
How do you find a way to schedule the time you need in order to come back to real life refreshed and stress-free?
Schedule it. When you have a lot of activities on your plate, it is far too easy to put yourself as the last priority. The problem with this is that you are often bumped off the list completely. When you have decided what the most relaxing activity for you is, then mark it in your calendar and keep the appointment with the same diligence that you would any other one. Make a choice to stick to it and not to stand yourself up.
Enlist Help. Perhaps you are a busy mother who finds it hard to ask for help. Maybe you are looking after an aging family member and the responsibility has fallen onto your shoulders. Or perhaps you have a job where everyone unloads their expectations at the last minute and expects you to jump.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Although our society values independence, we do best when we work as a team. People are not always perceptive enough to know when you need assistance, and it is up to you to ask for help when necessary. Don’t be afraid to request it. It is a sign of strength, not weakness.
Prioritize Your Favorite Things. Make a list of all the activities that help you unwind. Decide which ones are your favorites and make plans to schedule them in. Making a list of priorities, even recreational, is a good way to ensure that you will have the time necessary to do what you most desire to.
If you are a mother, you will likely have to deal with the issue of childcare. It can be very difficult to find time for yourself when you are caring for little ones, or even older children. There are a few ways a person can tackle this.
If you have a friend in a similar situation, try arranging a childcare swap. This way you can decide on an amount of time to babysit each other’s children without pay, since each will be giving equally of his or her time. If none of your friends are looking for childcare themselves, consider spending the money to hire a babysitter. It will be well worth what you invest in order to have some downtime. Please see my post: For Parents of Small Children.
Bring a Friend. If your idea of de-stressing involves gossiping and fellowship, call one of your good friends and invite them to join you for some relaxation. Laughter is known to be one of the best methods of de-stressing available. Call a friend who you love to be around, or bring someone who enjoys similar activities that you do. It will give you a chance to chase away your problems with a chat and a visit.
Stress seems like a normal part of life, but it doesn’t have to be that way if you’re willing to put your sanity first. Most of the time there’s a simple fix to the challenges that are causing you stress, but we must remain conscious of our stress levels and do all that we can to reduce them.
Leave a Reply